Saturday, July 28, 2012

Facing the “music” in our mistakes and losses.

Problems arise everyday in our lives.
Your choice:  how do you handle them?
As a man, I often face them with either anger, or withdrawal.
Recently a friend shared his distaste for confrontation.
He said, “its not that I freeze up when a hostile argument begins,
like I cannot think of something to do or say,
its just that I am afraid of being proven wrong,
because then I begin to question myself,
doubting my own thoughts, feelings, and experiences,
until I am too consumed with uncertainty to do anything.”
This is when our egos are crushed,
and our ‘spirit’ goes with it,
reducing the self-perception of our “manhood”,
but should it?

When did we become afraid of making mistakes?
Of arguing, debating, paying a game, and losing?
Where does it say I have to get everything right and win??
(Has our ego become so fragile?)
Here is a self-test for to try out...
are you ready to give and serve,
to stand strong in the battle,
to lay low the pride most men fear losing,
by letting someone else win?

An idea of comparison:
Will you let a child win the next game you play together?
Will you have to win the next disagreement
by forcing your opinion on someone else?
If someone strikes you on the face with a fist,
do you feel the need to retaliate?

As a man, I have a choice in how I make others feel,
even if they have hurt me first.
If I lose a game, can I congratulate the other person?
Can I quit arguing, and instead enjoy the company of those I love?

Too many men try to overcompensate
for the internal fears that force us to ask the question...
am I really a man if I let “this event” happen?
Some of us have become so fearful
that we quit taking risks,
and then we become only a “shell” of a man.

My strength, OUR strength,
does not become less when someone else wins.
The man God made me to be does not diminish,
when someone strikes me and I do not strike back.
And if you make a mistake, face it like a man,
then get back up and try again.
Dont give up and question who you are.
Instead, find a new place to start,
and begin looking for a new and different ending.

Our mistakes dont define us.
Our failures and losses dont determine our future,
they simply shape how we will act now for tomorrow.

“Where you've been doesn’t matter as much

as the direction you’re going today.” -Rick Warren

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