Tuesday, November 27, 2012

New Post: "Push Into the Difficult - Part 2"

Where do many of the problems in our life come from?
Communication.
Or rather, our inability to understand how to communicate,
because we dont know our own limitations
to speaking, and listening to one another.

What we hear in our own minds when we speak
is often different from what others hear when listening to us.

Imagine you are trying to describe a beautiful scene.
You give details of colors, textures, and perhaps even the sounds,
but what if your audience has no such experience themselves,
and therefore cannot begin to envision the same thing you see?

Now try to imagine you are having an issue
with someone whom you speak to on a daily basis.
How often does mis-communication occur?
Your boss gets mad and yells at you.
Your spouse shuts down and wont respond to you.
What can you do different to improve these common interactions?

First, be willing to push into the difficulty
by changing your style of communication.
Second, change your attitude to one of learning,
and learn to listen differently.

Can you imagine what your day would be like
if each person you connected with felt understood by you?
Would they feel closer to you?
Perhaps even more respectfed because you took the time to listen??
Listening is two parts though...
hearing what someone has to say,
then, telling them what you heard.
You may be surprised by how it affects you both.
Feelings change, because you slowed down long enough to hear them.

Is it easy? NO!
And that is why I say it is important to “push into” this difficult area.

How do you do this?
Practice.
Try to keep your own mouth shut... for at least two minutes.
Then ask questions that show you were listening.
But more importantly, be prepared to change your mind!

We often jump to conclusions about what someone else means,
leading us into all sorts of conflict that could have been avoided.
Why is it so difficult?
Because it takes considerable time to do this...
and it requires us to give more than we may feel comfortable with.
Do it anyway - because the people in your life are important

and the results will be amazing. I promise!

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