Saturday, May 2, 2015

New Post: "Struggling with Self-Importance"

There is difficulty knowing what to focus on each day.
While in prison, there was only so much I could do:
Eat, sleep, exercise, write, study, repeat.

Once released, there seemed to be so many options,
But the smart choices revolved around staying out:
Reporting daily, attending meetings, searching for work.
Now, I have a few years "off-paper",
And there is great freedom in what I get to enjoy now, but
I often get lost in doing things that are simply "good",
But a far cry from what's "best".

The last few weeks I wrote about the chance to buy a house,
But- it didn't work out, and now we are staying with friends.
It's easy to worry about this, and all the other things I want.
But what about my wife? Or the friends letting us live with them?
And when I do consider them, do I give up what's best?

The problem is determining what is most important;
Either from listening to our own internal monologue (self-talk),
Or from listening to the guidance and direction of other people.

The challenge: 
Where do our own internal ideas come from?
Most often, it is the prideful self-importance
That comes from the lies of satan.

Satan tells us that if we don't get what we want,
We may never get to be happy
Because no one else is watching out for us.

The world and its experience tells us a similar variation,
However - with very Conflicting Directions:

Work more on developing yourself.
versus
Work more on developing relationships with others.

How do we do either? Should we try both?
But, if we cannot make ourselves or others happy with our choices,
Then what is the best answer?

I believe the answer comes in using wisdom to guide us,
Because the best choices may not please anyone right now.

The best choices are often difficult - for everyone.
My wife and our friends may both be uncomfortable,
And as a result I may have to live with their discomfort.

I am reminded of a story about a child who broke her leg.
The parents could not get to medical attention right away,
And when the doctors finally did see the child,
Had to give the news the leg must be re-broken
Before it can be "reset" to grow straight.

The parents listened to the cracking sounds,
And the child's tears began all over again.
But the result was a nearly perfect leg,
For it had been set straight, and healed stronger than before!

The pain of our immediate circumstances is often short-term,
And we must be willing to push through the difficult times for a better outcome.

If that means having patience,
And enduring the displeasure of those you love,
Will you give up your comfort for a greater reward in the future?

Everyone involved may have to give-up something in the process,
And that's where our self-importance lies to us,
Telling us we should never have to endure hardship 
Especially at the hands of those we love.

What could you release today,
 to gain what is better for everyone tomorrow?

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